Fear Not a Mis-Fitting Size — The Laments Will Gladly Stitch Another for Free.
  • Play A Trick On A Witch Classic Shoes - Jaded Lament
  • Play A Trick On A Witch Classic Shoes - Jaded Lament
  • Play A Trick On A Witch Classic Shoes - Jaded Lament
  • Play A Trick On A Witch Classic Shoes - Jaded Lament
  • Play A Trick On A Witch Classic Shoes - Jaded Lament
  • Play A Trick On A Witch Classic Shoes - Jaded Lament
  • Play A Trick On A Witch Classic Shoes - Jaded Lament
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Play A Trick On A Witch Classic Shoes

Brothers Grimm Hansel and Gretel Canvas Classic Shoes

$95.00 USD
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When the forest grows thick and the bread trail fades, only wit will save you.

Drawn from a 1922 German illustration of Hansel and Gretel, this design captures the tale’s cruelest sleight of hand: the moment the blind witch feels for flesh, and finds only bone. It’s a trick of desperation, a lie of survival—and a story older than fire. Rendered in scorched crimson and coal-black, every inch of this shoe whispers of soot, hunger, and cunning.

A black cat curls knowingly at the scene’s edge. The witch’s clawed hands stretch forward, gnarled and deceived. The preserved linework from the original print has been resurrected with near-ritual care, complete with a jagged quote etched like an incantation: “Hansel put out a knuckle-bone…”

This is not the gingerbread cottage of your childhood. This is the version with teeth. With ash in the oven. With cleverness that cuts like a blade. This is where the tale turned.

Wonders Whispered About These Wares

Powers Bestowed Upon the Possessor

Bone of the Deceiver – Bestows the cunning to outwit those who seek to consume or control, through illusions both elegant and strange.

Ashward Tenacity – Grants a fierce inner strength that burns hotter the more dire the peril.

Complicit Familiar – Summons spectral allies from shadow and memory—particularly when the fire grows low and trust wears thin.

Jaded Lament Discovery Note

As for how it was found? Lament scribes recovered the image from the margins of a burned schoolbook sealed inside a bread tin, discovered in the hollow floorboards of a collapsed inn near Kassel. They say the pages were still warm to the touch.

Why the Laments Loved This Artifact

• Ember-red and soot-black palette mirrors the burned hearth and the bloodless lie
• Features the 1922 German illustration in full antique detail
• Sharp storytelling carried across the panels like scenes from a woodcut book
• Ideal for those who love the old tales before they were softened for bedtime

Adored By (and Designed For)

  • Devotees of folklore, fairy tales, and forest-woven trickery
  • Writers, artists, and witches who favor cunning over cruelty
  • Readers who cheer when the prey becomes predator
  • Anyone who has ever seen through the sweet façade and smiled

Atmospheres Clinging to These Relics

  • Folkloric menace
  • Vintage horror with a wink
  • Smoldering survival
  • Subversive childhood memory

These Vibes Shall Be the Emanation

Grim. Glorious. Cunning. These shoes are a love letter to childhood horror—not the kind found in screams, but in silences. In waiting ovens. In a brittle-boned trick that spares the clever and dooms the greedy. The kind of story you carry with you long after the breadcrumbs rot.

Hymns to Strengthen Thy Enchanted Relic

Lend Thine Ear, Fortify Thy Powers. Invoke these chants whilst donning thy wares, that the enchantment might seep deeper into thy bones.

(1) "Little Dark Age" – MGMT
Gothic synth-pop laced with dread and defiance, like a fairytale through cracked glass.

(2) "In the Room Where You Sleep" – Dead Man’s Bones
Creeping childhood menace wrapped in ghostly choruses.

(3) "The Witch" – The Raveonettes
Sugary and sinister, like a spell disguised as a lullaby.

(4) "Candy" – Cults
Deceptively sweet, with undertones of danger and refusal.

(5) "Seven Devils" – Florence + The Machine
A blazing, witchy anthem for those who know the darkness, and walk through it anyway.

This mix conjures the twisted path, the firelight trick, and the thrill of outwitting monsters older than memory.

The Tedious but Necessary Bits

  • Size Sorrows Be Gone

    The Laments Shall Stitch Another Pair If Yours Don’t Fit.

    • Fits true, like fate.
    • Removable insole—should you wish to walk a softer path.
    • Crafted from premium materials, blessed and battle-ready.
    • Canvas kissed by design, grounded by a rubber sole.
    • Colors hold fast like memory—vivid, precise, unforgettable.
    • Made-to-order, conjured just for you—no two pairs walk the same world.

  • Trade Routes, Tides & Transit

    A Note from the Laments Regarding Fulfillment: Each relic is conjured upon request, hand-wrought in our faraway atelier with care befitting the Old Ways. Most emerge within 5–10 days; arrival at your threshold may span 2–3 weeks, depending on tides, tempests, or logistics beyond mortal control.

    Some parcels may arrive separately—such is the nature of enchanted logistics.

    Should you harbor questions, omens, or mere curiosities, the Laments are always listening. Reach out at will.