• Roses For The Dead Car Seat Cover - Jaded Lament
  • Roses For The Dead Car Seat Cover - Jaded Lament
  • Roses For The Dead Car Seat Cover - Jaded Lament
  • Roses For The Dead Car Seat Cover - Jaded Lament
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Roses For The Dead Car Seat Cover

Stop and Smell the Afterlife

$89.99 USD
$109.99 USD $89.99 USD
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Free size replacement!

This is what happens when death decides to dress up. Not in robes, but in roses. Not in mourning, but in full bloom.

Roses for the Dead hightops are a bold, feverish meditation on the romance of decay. A gleaming skull—awash in spectral cyan, lit like moonlight on cold marble—grins out from each foot, wreathed in lush, twisting roses that drip red like heartbeats bled into velvet. The contrast is electric: cool, cerulean bone against a bloom-red riot of petals. This is not a warning. It’s an invitation.

The symmetry across both shoes evokes an altar. A shrine. A death-kissed garden. These are not passive florals—they do not wilt. They watch. They burn. They survive. The skull doesn’t leer—it smiles. As if it knows the secret of every last breath and considers it rather beautiful.

Size Guide

Size Guide

Wonders Whispered About These Wares

Powers Bestowed Upon the Possessor

• Floral Sovereignty – Rule the realm where beauty and death intertwine.
• Bone-Bloomed Grace – Step lightly, as though your shoes were grown from grief and silk.
• Eternal Arrangement – Be unforgettable. Especially to the ones who tried to bury you.

Jaded Lament Discovery Note

According to Lamentian folklore (specifically the long-banned horticultural grimoire Garden of Forgotten Faces), these shoes once grew directly from a grave. The florist buried there had a reputation for binding curses into every bouquet. Her last wish? That her bones bloom forever. What emerged was this design—rooted in love, watered in loss, and worn like a crown you drag with your feet.

Why the Laments Loved This Artifact

Because they never saw death as ugly. Because they knew roses belong in cemeteries as much as in weddings. Because this design didn’t flinch. The Laments wore these shoes to midnight masses, to cemetery picnics, to arguments that ended in poetry. They saw in this bloom a promise: that nothing truly beautiful ever dies—it just gets louder.

Adored By (and Designed For)

• Gothic romantics who believe funerals are just floral fashion shows
• Tattoo culture connoisseurs craving skull-and-rose perfection
• Fans of dark florals, botanical symbolism, and glamorous decay
• Anyone who ever whispered “til death” and meant it like a prayer

Atmospheres Clinging to These Relics

• Sensual macabre
• Mortality in bloom
• Romantic finality
• Velvet and bone
• Ceremony, not sorrow

These Vibes Shall Be the Emanation

The Roses for the Dead hightops feature a striking, symmetrical design: a spectral skull—etched in cold, electric blue—wreathed in lush, bleeding roses. The contrast is blinding in the best way: life bursts from death, crimson curls against bleached bone, while cool teal shadows offer a quiet chill. The design forms a chapel of duality—love and loss, bloom and bone, pleasure and passing. There is no soft sentimentality here. This isn’t a funeral. It’s a coronation.

Hymns to Strengthen Thy Enchanted Relic

Lend Thine Ear, Fortify Thy Powers. Invoke these chants whilst donning thy wares, that the enchantment might seep deeper into thy bones.

(1) "Dead Flowers" – Miranda Lambert
A modern country requiem for beauty left behind—burned-out, bitter, and undeniably alive.

(2) "Where the Wild Roses Grow" – Nick Cave & Kylie Minogue
Murder ballad meets love song. Delicate and deadly. A rose pressed between crime and confession.

(3) "Roseability" – Idlewild
Literary longing and floral metaphors in a rock framework—feels like shouting elegies into bloom.

(4) "Skeleton" – Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Brittle, seductive, and eerie—like dancing in the bones of who you used to be.

(5) "Garden" – Dua Saleh
Sultry, slow-burning, and almost ceremonial—perfect for planting roses in memory’s darkest soil.

This mix captures the blooming edge of death, the sensual elegance of decay, and the strange comfort of a skull crowned in roses.

  • The Tedious but Necessary Bits

    • Crafted from premium materials, blessed and battle-ready.
    • Colors hold fast like memory—vivid, precise, unforgettable.
    • Made-to-order, conjured just for you—no two pairs walk the same world.
    • Set of 2 custom printed car seat covers
    • Amazing colors and print quality
    • Constructed with high-quality polyester micro-fiber fabric for maximum durability and comfort
    • Add style to your seats while protecting them from spills stains, tearing, fading and more
    • Designed for quick and easy installation on most car and SUV bucket styles seats, no tools required
    • Elastic backing and fastening system ensures a snug and secure universal fit on most standard car and SUV seats
    • Not for use on seats with integrated airbags, seatbelts and or armrests
    • Will not fit on extra large bucket/ truck/ SUV seats
    • Care instructions: Remove the cover from the car seat. Hand-wash using cold water and mild soap. Don't use bleach or washing machine. Lie flat or line to dry. Don't use the dryer or iron the cover.

  • Trade Routes, Tides & Transit

    A Note from the Laments Regarding Fulfillment: Each relic is conjured upon request, hand-wrought in our faraway atelier with care befitting the Old Ways. Most emerge within 5–10 days; arrival at your threshold may span 2–3 weeks, depending on tides, tempests, or logistics beyond mortal control.

    Some parcels may arrive separately—such is the nature of enchanted logistics.

    Should you harbor questions, omens, or mere curiosities, the Laments are always listening. Reach out at will.